Rejection. It’s not something we often talk about on this blog. Instead we try to keep it light hearted and positive, filled with inspiring posts to keep moral, and motivation, high.
But sometimes we have to talk about the dark side of life. Some people think I’ve had it fairly easy when it came to publishing. In a way, I did. I sent out several enquiries and was lucky enough to be picked up with my third one. Torquere Press have been incredibly nice to me over the past few years and I love working with them. For me, they’re the publishing family many people can only dream of.
Yet there was plenty of rejection before that time, and there’s been plenty afterwards. There were the two documentaries that ended in the pre-production stages. One got as far as funding before someone, somewhere, said “No”. It was with great regret that we had to pull the plug.
There have been competitions I’ve entered where I’ve not even been placed. Over the years, I’ve been rejected for more jobs than I can count. Lovers and friends have rejected me. But I admit my own failings in those instances. I wasn't completely blameless when it came to the breakdown of relationships.
Last year I sent out two hundred requests for interviews for a book. Only one of them bothered to reply, and that was in the negative. And it wasn’t because they were rushed or ill thought out. The packs that were sent out had had hours of thought put in to them. They were sent past legal, proof reading, and creative teams. Yet despite the time, effort, and thought that had gone into the packs, and the project, it still came to nothing.
There have been many, many other instances where a door I’ve wanted to open has remained firmly locked. Rejection is painful. It can shatter hearts and stop lives in their tracks. There have been many times where I’ve wondered why I’ve carried on doing what I do. I’ve debated stopping all together because, at the end of the day, is it worth it? Will there be any rewards from the seeds I’ve sown?
Yet there have been many rewards. There are new friends, beautiful reviews, the chance to travel from time to time, and a couple of awards. I’ve seen my destroyed confidence slowly grow with it and, right now, I feel far better than I have done in many years. Also, deep in my soul is this desire to create. It’s a desire that I’ve tried to kill time and again. But it refuses to die. With each rejection it comes back stronger, a bright light that calls to me.
Maybe there have been doors that aren’t mine to open. If they are, I just move on to the next one. Recently I’ve started listening to not just my heart, but also my friends and family. I’ve taken things and adapted them and, over time, I’ve started to watch them grow into new things. It’s a great feeling to be planting new seeds and watching them flourish.
Never give up; I believe that’s the motto of this post. Listen to your heart and keep on following it. Don't let the pain of the past ruin the pleasure of the future. Yes, the rejection will hurt but it’s a pain that will only last for a heartbeat. After that, it’s time to pick up yourself up and carry on. Because you have no idea which door is going to open for you.