Times Like These

For those not in my immediate loop of people, the past few weeks have been a whirlwind. Friday June 19^th was supposed to be a special day. It was one my family and I had been looking forward to since November. We'd fought long and hard to get tickets to the concert. For me, it was going to be the gift that marked a milestone in a long recovery process.

Then, in a moment of sheer bad luck, it all disappeared.

June 19^th would have been the first of the Foo Fighters two nights at Wembley Stadium. On June 12^th, Dave Grohl fell from the stage and broke his leg resulting in the rest of the UK and European tour being cancelled. The outpouring of grief was insurmountable although the majority was aimed at Grohl's injury rather than the concerts being written off. Music fans, thankfully, are both loyal and extremely understanding. While people tried to keep the hope alive it was obvious that the shows wouldn't happen.

The cancellations brought another problem with them. Thousands of people had already descended on London for the shows, many of them flying in from abroad or with travel and hotel costs that couldn't be refunded. Many of them were looking for an alternative night out.

Bristol based music project, Given to Live, had already arranged to have two shows running alongside the Foo Fighters concerts. Beginning in the early afternoon, they'd run up until Wembley's gates opened, before picking up after the concerts ended. They were aimed at giving fans the chance to meet one another as well as raising vital funds and allowing unsigned bands the chance to sign right beside one of the country's iconic music venues.

However, they were now faced with a dilemma. Continue, knowing that the 160,000 potential footfall had now disappeared? Or scrap the shows all together?

Where there's a will, there's a way and, in less than 48 hours, a new plan was formed. On Wednesday evening, it was announced that the UK Foo Fighters would headline both nights. Something was being born from nothing.

I was originally going to go along and review the Friday show. After that, I'd stay overnight and travel home on the Saturday. But the best laid plans don't always pan out and I found myself quickly rearranging plans to stay until Sunday afternoon.

What occurred while I was there were two extremely magical evenings. 1200 people passed through the doors of the Crystal Clubs. Nine bands played over the two nights. And a lot of people had a lot of fun. Something had been rescued from the ashes of what could otherwise have been just another London evening. On the Sunday, the UK Foo Fighters confirmed that they were also going to play the cancelled June 23^rd show, too. My pride and joy right now is a text message from that show which simply reads “Sold out” (I couldn't make it due to other commitments). 

There are a lot of people I want to thank from that weekend. But who to thank first?

Over the three dates, nearly 2000 people passed through the doors of the shows. Seeing their sadness turn to joy and happiness was an honour. Hearing them sing every word of every song was a pleasure.

The wonderful Tom who, throughout it all, was a constant inspiration. Never have I seen someone so passionate and determined and, in doing so, he reignited my own love and passion for working with music. He's someone who will have a special place in my heart.

The UK Foo Fighters whose kindness and generosity has taught me a lot. If you ever get the chance, go and see them. They really are worth every moment of your time and I can't wait to see them again.

Darren, Given To Live's artist in residence, for being one of the most beautiful souls I've ever met. He's another of the many people who inspired me over that weekend and it was a pleasure to spend time with him.

Sarah, who propped me up and loved me when I could now longer do it for myself.

The bands who played on June 19^th and 20^th. All of them have a place in my heart and I can't wait to work with them again. They came from all corners of the country and gave their all on those days.

I learned a lot about myself over those few days. I remembered how much I enjoyed working with musicians. I remembered how long I could work for before I had to give up. Most of all, I learned that grit and determination can get the ball rolling when the chips are down.

It just goes to show that, when life gives you lemons, you truly can create Something From Nothing.

For more photos and information, please visit Given to Live's Facebook page.You can also read Tom's interview with this site here.

Dave Grohl Breaks His Leg and Cancels Shows...

...And the internet reacts in just the way you'd expect them to. While Dave's injury has caused some shows to be cancelled, they do say laughter is the best medicine. Get well soon, Dave!

(Never thought I'd do one of these posts but some of the tweets have been making my weekend.)

Hi @foofighters Dave Whelan played at Wembley with a broken leg. True story. Will Dave Grohl do the same? Asking for the fans. Obvs.

— Bald 4 Eyed Bob (@bald4eyedbob) June 14, 2015

@foofighters good job you didn't do it in UK you would still be waiting in A+E now

— Kim Williams (@kawilliams9899) June 14, 2015

I'm not sure I'm emotionally stable enough to handle Foo Fighters cancelling their Wembley gigs #GetwellSoonDave

— Jonathan Warlow (@jonowarlow) June 13, 2015

@foofighters don't cancel Wembley. I've got some aspirin if you need it

— TommyTheGun (@TomtheGinge) June 13, 2015

Get a ticket for Michael Jackson, then he dies. Get tickets for #foofighters at wembley and Dave breaks his leg. Get well son. X

— MC Elmo (@Mike_Wiseman) June 13, 2015

Def Leppards drummer plays with one arm. Justin Bieber sings without a voice OR brain. There is no way the #FooFighters will cancel #Wembley

— Speedoman (@Sheppyuk) June 14, 2015

Gotta love the optimism of people trying to sell @foofighters tickets for #Wembley right now

— Andrew (@theboytemps) June 14, 2015

@AdamMcMusic What were the odds of Dave Grohl breaking his leg when he fell off the stage? "One in ten" #foofighters #bantz

— Adam McLoughlin (@AdamMcMusic) June 14, 2015

@xfm don't believe it man, first gig of year in London was Black Keys - drummer did shoulder, no gig - Nr 2 - The Foo Fighters!

— @PaxtonPat (@paxtonpat) June 13, 2015

I'd just like to apologise to Dave Grohl for breaking his leg... Every time we organise to go London something shit happens @foofighters

— Lauren Herrick (@laurenherrick) June 13, 2015

My Life Jigsaw

Being off anti-psychotic medication is like having an unfinished jigsaw. You can see the picture and you might even know what it looks like when it's finished. But there are pieces missing. Sometimes it's a few pieces. Sometimes it's most of the puzzle.

That's how I currently feel. Which is one of the reasons I haven't done a lot with this website. Or much else for that matter. Back in March, there was a mostly completed jigsaw that I called “My Life”. There were a few pieces I was waiting to put in to place before I felt like I was mostly complete.

Then I took the final doses of the drug and, as it slowly left my system, the jigsaw was tossed in to the air. Suddenly I was staring at a small pile of jigsaw pieces, unsure of what to do with them. Some are easy to put back in to place. Some are not so easy to fit back into the puzzle and now I'm finding myself left with a little pile of pieces.

So how do you recover from medication withdrawal? It differs from person to person. One person may find it easy while another may find the transition extremely difficult.

I feel like I'm somewhere in the middle. I'm enjoying being off the drugs and “flying free”. The ideas are flowing and the laughter comes easily. Yet, at times, I find that difficult. Inspiration and energy come and go in waves. Some days I'll write for hours. Other days I won't even look at my current project. I haven't written much in the past month, this post being the first thing I've really sat down and thought about.

Conversation is another thing I'm struggling with and I'm so thankful for the people who are giving me time to talk, even when I'm slow to find the words I want.

Dealing with day to day life has had both its ups and downs and I'm grateful for those who are walking that walk with me. The people I live, work, and interact with have been so loving and generous, giving me the time and space I need to adapt to this “brave, new world” I'm finding myself in. Sometimes I get it wrong. Sometimes I get confused. But the excitement at realising that I can do something, unaided by another person or pharmaceutical intervention is the biggest reward right now. I could win the lottery but remembering to put the bin out at the right time or taking my vitamins is a far bigger achievement.

Emotions often swing between raw and excited. I've shed more tears in the past month than I have in the past decade. Tears, I've discovered, are cathartic and clearing, slowly healing my newly recovered soul.

Sure, it feels like it's been a bit of a rough year so far. But right now it feels good to be alive and take on the world. I can't wait to see what tomorrow, next month, and next year have in store!