Help Yourself

There's only one person on this planet who can help you.

You.

You are the only person who can make the decision with what to do with your life. You are the only person who can make the decision on where to go, what to see, and how to live. If you want to get treatment for yourself, that's your decision. If you want to travel, that's your decision. If you want to work, that's your decision.

But the only person who will help you get to where you want to go, whether that's a physical or mental destination, is you. Of course, you can ask for help along the way but no one is going to come up to you and offer it all on a plate. You have to get out there and work for what you want, be that better health, a better job, a better home, or a better life.

I had to learn that and I learned it the hard way. I believe that the things I wanted in life would fall in to my lap. I believed that I didn't have to work to get somewhere and that just daydreaming about the life I wanted would be enough.

Boy, was I wrong.

Over the past several years, I've had quite a few doses of reality be it tough love from family to trying to open career doors that aren't yet ready to be opened. Each time has been a painful learning experience and I've learned to stop and evaluate my life. What do I want? How can I get there? Do I need new skills to achieve it? How can I get out of the rut that I'm stuck in? How could I change myself to become a better person?

Because of these experiences, I decided to move away from writing fiction and turn to non-fiction. I realised that I had a talent for getting people to talk and to being able to listen to what they had to say. I decided to combine that with my writing and began working on two books that documented the lives of the people around me. As I started working on the books, I realised that I was the happiest I'd been. No longer did I feel stressed. Nor did I feel like I was pushing at doors that were locked.

If there's something that you want to do, only you can get there. You need to sit back and evaluate your life. Do you notice patterns of conflict in your life? If so, how can you solve them? What do you need to change about yourself? Are you too critical? Does your anger flare too quickly? Do you need to gain new skills? Do you need to move house? Do you need to change your career path? Do you need to stop hanging out with certain people?

Keep a journal and see what pushes your buttons. You don't have to write in it every day and, over time, you'll be able to begin working on getting to the place that you want to be.

You can do whatever you put your mind to but, in order to get there, you need to give yourself a dose of tough love in order to get there.

Happiness isn't a destination; it's a journey.