Rejection. It’s not
something we often talk about on this blog. Instead we try to keep it
light hearted and positive, filled with inspiring posts to keep
moral, and motivation, high.
But sometimes we have
to talk about the dark side of life. Some people think I’ve had it
fairly easy when it came to publishing. In a way, I did. I sent out
several enquiries and was lucky enough to be picked up with my third
one. Torquere Press have been incredibly nice to me over the past few
years and I love working with them. For me, they’re the publishing
family many people can only dream of.
Yet there was plenty of
rejection before that time, and there’s been plenty afterwards.
There were the two documentaries that ended in the pre-production
stages. One got as far as funding before someone, somewhere, said
“No”. It was with great regret that we had to pull the plug.
There have been
competitions I’ve entered where I’ve not even been placed. Over
the years, I’ve been rejected for more jobs than I can count. Lovers and friends have rejected me. But I admit my own failings in those instances. I wasn't completely blameless when it came to the breakdown of relationships.
Last year I sent out
two hundred requests for interviews for a book. Only one of them
bothered to reply, and that was in the negative. And it wasn’t
because they were rushed or ill thought out. The packs that were sent
out had had hours of thought put in to them. They were sent past
legal, proof reading, and creative teams. Yet despite the time,
effort, and thought that had gone into the packs, and the project, it
still came to nothing.
There have been many,
many other instances where a door I’ve wanted to open has remained
firmly locked. Rejection is painful. It can shatter hearts and stop
lives in their tracks. There have been many times where I’ve
wondered why I’ve carried on doing what I do. I’ve debated
stopping all together because, at the end of the day, is it worth it?
Will there be any rewards from the seeds I’ve sown?
Yet there have been
many rewards. There are new friends, beautiful reviews, the chance to
travel from time to time, and a couple of awards. I’ve seen my
destroyed confidence slowly grow with it and, right now, I feel far
better than I have done in many years. Also, deep in my soul is this
desire to create. It’s a desire that I’ve tried to kill time and
again. But it refuses to die. With each rejection it comes back
stronger, a bright light that calls to me.
Maybe there have been
doors that aren’t mine to open. If they are, I just move on to the
next one. Recently I’ve started listening to not just my heart, but
also my friends and family. I’ve taken things and adapted them and,
over time, I’ve started to watch them grow into new things. It’s
a great feeling to be planting new seeds and watching them flourish.
Never give up; I
believe that’s the motto of this post. Listen to your heart and
keep on following it. Don't let the pain of the past ruin the pleasure of the future. Yes, the rejection will hurt but it’s a pain
that will only last for a heartbeat. After that, it’s time to pick
up yourself up and carry on. Because you have no idea which door is
going to open for you.
Believe in yourself, Rae. Because every moment is bringing you closer to where you are meant to be, amongst the stars. *BBH* J
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